the first...

It’s 28^th Jan 2016, I think I have not been that late for wishing everyone HAPPY NEW YEAR!! I don’t believe the year is old enough (abhi toh saal jawaan hai).  I know I am rusty and I feel like the old librarian trying to find the book which she knew she had stacked somewhere in the labyrinths of shelves. Anyhow, for the lack of any creative spurts and the disinterest of doing the homework (yeah, you read it right.. HOMEWORK!) hear me ramble, if you please.

I had a decent year I would say and “decent” only cause I had pretty high ups and low lows, so they kind of cancel out and settle somewhere in the middle. I was lucky enough to camp in couple of relatives places and friends. A failed birthday surprised in Texas, a risky interstate drive to Nebaraska and being rewarded by the heavenly view, magical Disneyland , not a snowy Christmas, cold and chilly new York with someone warm to hold on to (wink wink). I have loved my trips and tedious long flights. And believe it or not I have loved staying with my aunts and uncles. I know I had stated contrary on some posts about my relatives but that’s what a foreign land does to you. You yearn for that familiarity and you try to find it anywhere even if it means going to a dingy Indian market and hearing gujus talk (no offence :P)

the 800km drive to 6,225 ft.. Lake tahoe.

the magic wand!

I might elaborate on my trips if memory, mood and enthusiasm stays, but let me describe the first snow/ blizzard of my entire three and twenty years. (I have lived that long!) The blizzard is not magical if that’s what you were looking for. There is snow in your eyes, ears, mouth, pockets (warning, do not try this at home) but the bunch of us the three wise monkeys went to experience the blizzard inspired by the overflowing photos of people in snow (amateurs!) and didn’t put any photos up.(laziness) but oh! What a feeling when you step out with the cold winds and falling snow and freezing hands. After an entire day of snowing and blizzarding when all had ended it was surreal. There was inches of whiteness all over untouched, sparkling in sunlight, icicles hanging from rooftops. Claiming to be a veteran of the snow (certainly more experienced with it than most of my tropical friends) but somehow this felt more intimate, more real. To think of, its nothing but white its simple but yet so breath-takingly beautiful, of course before we ran all over it and made it look like a crumbled paper. It felt like natures unused sketching papers just lieing around waiting to be inked.

It all sounds very romantic for now, but wait till you have to see that for the next three months and the white snow doesn’t stay white anymore! (what a delusion!)

white wonder! (my backyard)

I could have gone on but I guess I have spoken long enough for now. 

it's always the race against numbers!

a letter

to the ever cruel hope,

me thinks it's not the diseases, not the epidemics, not the sadness, nor the greed which Pandora unleashed in the world by her stupid curiosity and disobedience than the evil disguised as good glittering and twinkling fairy which everyone likes to believe to be "HOPE"... the idea of hope is as virtual as the believe that you are what the mirror shows you... hope does as much goodness as much you find a Nazi helping a Jew.. its as pathetic as Indian belly swollen , greedy-oiled-paan-chewing politicians... hope is as cruel as listening to Justin Bieber and  Rebecca Black mash up with Miley Cyrus dancing over a destruction ball X 1000.... its as delusional as all the cosmetic product ads put together.... its as evil as the person who promises you to buy kulfi turns out that he is trying to kidnap you..

hope disgusts me now more than ever.. if you were a person i did probably hate you more than Voldermort. which is ALOT! you have poked me where i was sourest, you have mentally raped me when i was the weakest (i know inappropriate use, but nothing was more befitting)... i had sworn allegiance with you at a tender age no matter what may come.. but you.. you pushed me right off the cliff , while my back was turned to you.. such was your partnership?! you disgust me to the level where even pimpled toads seem a pretty site...

hope.... GAAAHHH!!! may you be locked in the boiling depths of tarturus and burn in inferno for a period unknown...

yours once-a-believer..

the Oswald fix!

why does it feel like all the cosmic elements are plotting against you, to do even marginally well enough to pass in a totally useless subject such as E-commerce! why do engineers even have to study that?! adding to the already slippery nature of the subject plus the first signs of rains and the sweet breeze.. tell me.. how can anyone even think of looking into the book!!
crappy non-sense text book language over first rains.. need i say more??
even the last moment panic induced adrenaline seems feeble against this surreal climate!
i like to refer this fix situation similar to Oswald's (the big head blue octopus!) he had to either save the overflowing popcorns or the bubbles from the bubble bath... the "kya karu kya na k
aru" situation!
it's always a war of the mind and the brain .. but you know you are doing the wrong thing when both consent with each other..
the funny thing is each year there is always this one time i have faced a fix like this... and each time the wrong thing will be chosen to be done.. and each time there will be bubble joy followed by regret...some priorities are always messed up! =D

road trip wrappers...

Music ,wind, sun and please! not to forget my wayfarer glasses. It looked like a scene right out of ZNMD! Keeeeerrkk.. just, instead of the sky blue Buick, picture a truck in dashing orange. And oh! Say tata to the smooth roads of Spain and helloooo to the Indian grameen roads giving the pot-hole ridden Mumbai roads a tough competition.

It’s peculiarly common as to how these road trips come out to be the little lessons in life to which you look back and smile and say "Manh! Those were the days!" . My road trip taught me a few.

1. Always carry more jeans. (avoids the shocked expression of ma saying “did you sleep on mud?!”)

2. DO NOT drink outside water. Never. period.

3. Take the liberty of packing a first aid kit for a regiment.(cause most of the time you turn out to be travelling  with a group of ignorant hypocrites who are ninnies when it comes to health)

4. Check under the beds before leaving/checking out (it just might turn out that you left your charger there, doesn’t really matter how it landed there)

5. Always and always eat icecream whenever you are shivering to the bones!

6. Kick box anyone who is around.. (well ..cause it’s fun!)

7. Not to sit beside your NSP in an overnight bus. (cause if you droll while you sleep, chances with him/her will be down the drain forever!  )

8. Always have a dabba (dabba- old fashioned sans any fancy OS mobs) android people are cry babies when it comes to charging!

9. DO NOT carry camera, cause believe it or not there would be atleast one more guy who would be clicking same pics as you. So why do all the work?

10. This is one of the biggest lessons I have learnt.

 Acceptance.

 Acceptance of defeat. Of a better luck next time. That trip back to the hotel from the track was hardest most silent one, one could have ever sat through in a otherwise noisy group of 26. The moment of acceptance, that we had been disqualified. Of all those long nights in sparks and dust and grease and nuts equaling to nothing.

All stories aren’t fairy tales.. i guess.. but in the end there are always lessons to be learnt and memories to be wrapped for some far away meeting many years from now, when you sit with a glass, preferably bottles of drinks with the old college buddies and unwrap those discoloured boxes from the attic, to see that the flowers you had packed were still fresh and still full of tingly pollen to make you laugh over all of it. 

Cheers to a dusty luck and a clean tomorrow! Clink !

the wise old hobbly lady called herself "time"...

october rains..

Seasonal , nonseasonal . what the heck is happening with the weather???! Not that i am complaining of much as long it rains.. just as the mercury rises to the point of bursting out of the thermometer (that’s a bit of exaggeration there!) it starts raining hippopotamus and rhinosaurus all over the place and not to mention the glass shattering thunders and equally illuminating lightening.

May be mother earth is confused about what mood it wants to be in.. happens.. happens to all...

By now you must have realised that this post is just some random chit chats about this and that. For an unknown reason rains put into a hell-i-want- to write-something. With no good ideas for prose or story i resort to random gup-shaps.. so warning you before hand, continue at your own risk.

As i was laboring over some stupid neck breaking assignments i was brought to my sense by the darkening clouds outside and the cool wind.. it was all thunders and rain! And lucky me i was handed out hot coffee by ma whatelse one needs! Oh some parleG biscuit too (some of the rare sweet tooth moments!) perching myself on the sill with wind, rain, thunder.. the wind zipping through my already wild hair.. its one of those instantances when you go through these deep thought moments when ideas like what if it rained fireballs how would that look! (well ,that’s what i think.. all have their own thoughts!) with the now stone cold coffee and half of the biscuit sinking into it i returned to the ass-ignments.. but u2 goes wonderful with the mood. That’s all rejuvenating happened today. A month of surprises.! 

Walk on, walk on 

What you got they can't steal it 

No they can't even feel it 

Walk on, walk on... 

Stay safe tonight 

the price of being worthless.....is surprisingly high!

a land of disappointment...

To start with, there are ample no of things one is disappointed about ,it might be as huge as the book about understanding woman (which is seriously absurd, but nvm, that's a topic to chatter later about) .. i for one have constructed my topic of disappointment to the degradation of vacations.. 

Thinking back to the time of school days, the word “vacation” in itself made all kinds of ideas flood in.. and no, it had nothing to do with mobiles, facebooks, going to malls,etc..  known as the “kuda vali (garbage collector)” of the house due to a quirk of picking up and keeping boxes, bottles, pieces of thermocol, cardboards.. all had a purpose behind them.. the ultimate utilisation of their existence during vacation time. (inspite of ma’s valiant attempts into invading my room and clearing off my precious collections!) sitting down amid this weird garbage collection i planned my vacation around them.. many times my projects were failures and in the end i used to end up making black stringy things out of pieces of thermocols and with a hot knife and burning myself.... but it was a swing at creativity.. if not spending time on the wealth from waste agenda (which almost all the time was uglier from waste) there used to be grand planning of a picnic with friends(though, it was about a flimsy bedsheet  tent which was adamant on flying off with the glorious wind)

My disappointment comes to the part that somewhere in the growing up part those innocent creative surges have been lost.. now, my vacations are mostly spend on summer trainings and studies, at times i sneak off some minutes just wee seconds before sleeping for some reading for that's the thing which somehow makes me hang by the pinky finger by the cliff which was the land of “let the hand fly and there shalt be a picture”. The part where it’s no longer thought well enough for going on these make and catch the bedsheet afternoons is a whole lot of sadness..

 A voice for the kids of now.. who i never see enjoying these hols by going off for picnics nor for a morning fresh air cycling.. see the world out of the window and you shall never regret the days you spend down with the sun..

p.s: It might sound full of self-pity. But i do hope that you see past it and see the way bigger picture i am trying to show..

a post about nothing.. and rains!!

2 days left.. its a countdown done by all the 1000s of engg students who have been compelled to go through a torture period of a month which can be best expressed as a periodic function repeated within the interval of 4 months.. and goes by the name “exams”..

And by 2days left i mean for the last exam and the days of freedom and revelry to start until “the doom day”.. and the general question of why am i not deep into the catacomb of books  and writing down this boring to the core of posts is cause i don’t have not even one book to build a single stone of the catacomb.. just as i thought i might grace the book with my mighty presence it turns out it fled away by that prospect!..it was discovered that the only book i have had seems to have disappeared into thin air!(and this is the 2^nd book i lost this sem!) Last seen and heard of it was about 2 months ago... its sudden disappearance has gone unnoticed since the hour of need.. all this has queer stinge of “i am doomed” about it...

But setting aside all this depressing “hopelessness, self-disgust, irresponsible, depreciating  behaviour, and what nots”... “THE MONSOON” yes... dark heavy grey clouds...the meghamalhar aura... dimmed sun (like someone set the dimmer)  cool cool winds, rustling leaves (which always creates the delusion that its raining), anticipation of the first shower giving it a nostalgic flavour.. my! I have waited long for thy! Drench me and wash away the woeful summer.! Come and rain.. oh come for the parched land that seeks thou! Even the birds seem to chirp happily by the current in the air! (i could go on and on)

So all in all.. does anyone even think of studies now!its too much to ask from me! That would be an absurd request! 

                             oh cmon! what are you waiting for?? rain rain....   RAIN i say!!!!! 

 

life machine....

clang-click!!!!phut- phut...vroom vroom..... and yet again the clutches moves and gears shift to start the old used machine of everyday life... as it vibrates back to life the daily routine of college, tutions. lectures,assignments, friends and maniac professors start yet again.... as i bid adios to the life of leisure and welcome back the life of a crazy wanna be engineer...